That Chuck Lorre — he’s such a card. The creator of The Big Bang Theory, Young Sheldonand Mom — along with three other popular CBS sitcoms of the past two decades — tonight unveils his 600th post-episode vanity card. If fact, it’s a two-parter.
As for the card running after Young Sheldon and Mom? Here’s the full text of Lorre Vanity Card No. 600B:
As I write this, my six hundredth vanity card, I find myself fantasizing about a time, far in the future, when my cards have inexplicably become the scriptural basis for a new religion. Like in the classic sci-fi novel A Canticle For Leibowitz, each card would be studied, pondered and argued over by hermetic monks who fervently believe them to be documents of divine origin. In this imagined future, chaste and smelly men in threadbare woolen robes happily devote their entire lives trying to understand the entirely not esoteric words of me. And this would go on for thousands of years. Generation after generation of completely misguided wisdomseekers would write treatises on pointless essays that I wrote in a hurry (like this one). Even this card, which debunks the entire notion that there is anything of value in the previous five hundred and ninety-nine cards, would be analyzed for clues. And best of all, when no mountaintop epiphany occurs, when no transcendent revelation rips through their consciousness, my spiritual descendants, my acolytes would still believe. Because to acknowledge they’d been misled or fooled would be unthinkable. As a general rule, people prefer to be blind than stupid. So yeah, that’s my fantasy. And while I admit it betrays some wild-ass hubris on my part, I don’t see any real harm in it. Heck, in a world of infinite possibilities, where fiction and worship are often two sides of the same shekel, it could even happen. But in the meantime, this is my six hundredth vanity card. I wish it was better. Maybe in the future it will be.